The spider. Don’t forget this. Why did she fall? Physics, of course, but why? What meaning is there? Think with your gut; not your head. Make connections in the mundane. She fell. She was perfect. I was frightened. As was predicted. But she cowered, cold and collapsed in the window frame. She too was afraid. […]
One life: that’s what they say. So let me twirl, let me play; Dance like mad in the fading light. But I take your shawl and wrap it tight; you shallow sallow sunken friend; my dearest foe; a gray reflection as I go. Mutual distortions, you and I; Reflecting the will to survive. Yet, some […]
Black crows are silhouettes against a cotton sky. There is light. And there is dark. The dark cannot subsume the light. Shine a light, and the dark must give way. Shadows are wholly dependent. But light shines of its own accord. Black crows are silhouettes against a cotton sky.
This damn thing is an absurd joke. Oh not again. Not again. I’ve seen myself a thousand times and I have not changed a bit. One day it will all end. The ideals of a frightened boy: all smashed. One day it will all end and the ideals will not save me. We were made […]
There is no such thing as dishonesty. It doesn’t exist in any meaningful sense. In our deepest selves fluctuating values constantly tug on the strings of our wills. Behind any deceptive act is a value held to be true; a belief which, no matter how wrong might appear to another, completely informs the actions of […]
A new world opened before me. One overflowing with light and love. I am neither reluctant nor expectant to enter, for reluctance implies doubt, expectancy implies dependency; I neither fear what lies within, nor seek salvation. I know this world is meant for me. I will take my time to explore and learn. I will […]
Please take these words, and cast them across a crimson sky. Let the whole world read what I have been led to see. There is no pain so great, nor fear too deep, that a breath of pure love cannot ease. Allow love the day to seize. Let love reign, and be free.
Who am ITo say what any of this means?I have been sleepwalkingSince I was fourteen. Now as I write my songI retrace my stepsHonestly, it’s easierTo let myself forget. Still, I check my vital signsChoked up, I realizeI’ve been less than half myselfFor more than half my life. Wake upFall in love againWage war on […]
If there is no light, then there is no dark. I have fallen into the dark; I have become despair, doubt, infinite dread. The dark says, ‘Turn your back on the light, there is no hope there; the closer you are permitted to come to the light, the further you will inevitably fall. Stay here, […]
There’s a pain that only I may know. If it is common why do I feel so alone? ‘There is more day to dawn. The sun is but a morning star.’ Has this wisdom failed me, or have I chosen not to see? The love of two bound souls…the curves of hips and naked backs…mouths […]
Dear Lord. Almighty mighty Lord. You have graver grievances to attend, I am sure. But Lord, hear me out. Listen to my (self)-pitiful pleas. Please. They say there is no rest for the wicked. I say what a load of shit. (HORSESHIT my Lord. The wicked rest wonderfully. Deeply. Soundly. Undisturbed by haunting visions of […]
Good out of weakness. Strict normative principles so as to control the world. A moral absolutist so as not to get hurt. Actions not adhering to, not possible to adhere to, such strict moral principles. Hurt inevitably following. Afraid to live. Ashamed to love. Each breath self-reflective. Critical. Analytical. Simply not comfortable in my own […]
I know that. Living to avoid life. Erecting walls of fake concrete. Thick. High. Encompassing the spirit, the mind. I know that. Belief in those fake concrete walls. Belief they are impenetrable. Apparent safety within. Each minute head bowed. Praying, sacrificing, worshiping an illusion. Within the comfortable confines of illusory fortresses, ego is king. Weakness […]
Fear to fear to fear to fear. If sentences could readily bend, I’d twist that one end to end, To illustrate the following truth: Fear brings fear in an infinite loop. Instead a daily dose of wretched I shall permit – Of living life choked by anxious threat; Of more than words bending end to […]
Do I know fear? Never been in a war, a burning building. Never heard a gun fire, saw a child die. Never spent the night next to a loved one as she fought for survival. Never slept under a bridge, missed a day without eating. Never been mugged, accosted, molested. Do I know fear? Please […]
In my sleep? You coward. Attack a man while he slumbers. Red blood dripping from my right nostril. How close were you this time? In my nightmare I could sense your presence. Do you no longer attempt to conceal your footfalls? A coward and hasty. Are you afraid? Is this irony? Can fear by afraid? […]
You are blessed and cursed to have found your meaning in the question of meaning itself. Blessed to be motivated to take a journey of deepest discovery, not only of the universe without, but of the universe within. Cursed to be born in a world of believers, who are constantly and continuously tricked by the […]
Raising head, Lifting eyes from dark, Stepping outward, From underground. Strange hollowness, Echoes in mind, Empty of pretense, Confident in not knowing. Optimism seeking light, Broken long dormancy, Entering the world without, Blinding, suffocating familiarity. Same grey streets; Same concrete buildings; Same managed woods and rectangular fields and forgettable faces on Sunday walks on worn […]
Order born of fear. Claiming the seconds that make up the minutes that make up a life. Doubting, too, these thoughts.