The solitary seagull’s single squawk heard through the open bathroom window. I am too far inland for any sea bird to speak through tilted glass. A distorted remembrance of a time yet to come. I see myself there up ahead, as I imagine I was. A strong and confident man. Ten, maybe fifteen years from […]
Tag: love
Epitaph
There she lay. Clearly at peace. Unburdened of 93 years of life. A warrior; strong, resolute, stubborn, beautiful. Were those eyes to suddenly open, it wouldn’t have surprised me. Were she to beat death, it would simply draw from me a knowing smile. In life there are two options: to crawl into the past and […]
The greatest gift
The greatest gift you can give another is a piece of your deepest self. Not your time. Not your money; but something more precious still. Is it understanding, or compassion, or attention that you offer? Is there a word bringing these together? Love? That piece you offer freely, that is the gift. You offer without […]
Lyrics #8 – A Murder of One – Counting Crows
Check song out here. Blue morning, blue morning Wrapped in strands of fist and bone Curiosity, kitten Doesn’t have to mean you’re on your own You can look outside your window He doesn’t have to know We can talk a while, baby We can take it nice and slow All your life is such a […]
The war of the obsessed mind
With my fingernails broken I scratch, Every single hidden crevice and patch, Until I, tediously excavating the last, Finally from this space move past. And yet with doubt constantly plagued, Trapped wild beast mercilessly caged, In my head the war bloodily waged, Inane, insane, engulfed, enraged. Have you yourself lost in loops been? […]
Catharsis
I’m not reaching out. I’m not playing the victim. I’m not drowning in self-pity (though my knees are definitely wet). I’m reaching inward. I am fighting. I may be drowning in tears of frustration, sadness, hope, joy. I am suffering, but I am not only suffering. I am healing. Slowly, methodically, not always patiently, always […]
Lyrics #7 – I will survive – Cake cover
Listen here. At first I was afraid I was petrified I kept thinking I could never live without you by my side. But then I spent so many nights Just thinking how you’d done me wrong I grew strong I learned how to get along. And so you’re back From outer space I just walked […]
An old soul
I am an old soul. I weep at the beauty of woodland paths, of slanted sunbeams breaking through autumn canopies, and falling, twirling, dancing leaves of red, orange, yellow and brown. I love this world. And my existence. The animals in the forest, I know they are there. And that suffices. The trees, the streams, […]
4 am
I apologize in advance; I don’t want to bore you with these things. I know sooner than later I will be speaking alone to the abyss; my voice a fading echo traveling through stale air, reaching no ears. Nobody will hear. The pain, the fear. I want to run. Faster than the wind outside these […]
A life without you
And I can’t picture my life without you. Remember what you said: you leave now and she wins. Keep in mind, you pleaded, the reasons that brought us here. Walk in my shoes, you reminded me, see it from my eyes. Oh I tried. I tried and I came to see, to feel. The pain. […]
The fasting soul
There are words to capture how I feel, I have lowered my caloric intake to zero To discover what they are. My mind and body are one, Starving for nourishment, Twisting into hungry knots. What matters in this state? This life is all I get, And I fill it with emptiness; Cardboard cutouts of complex […]
Conversations with myself – #2
Stop feeding off my pain. I cannot take it any longer. The burden, the weight, is far too great. I am no longer your scapegoat, your bearer of misfortune. My pain cannot heal you. I am not your savior. Though I love you, I need my strength for me. For me and for them. (When […]
I only move if you push me
It is slowing down. The letters, the words, only now a trickle. A sign of change. Healing, optimism? Or the opposite: resignation? This….this is my life. This is my life? Resignation. Someone, oh someone pick me up! Bathe and clothe and nurture me. Point the way, or better yet, take me there. Oh, someone please […]
Fatherhood – a poem
Originally posted on The Abyss Post:
Silence reason and there, within A fruit of consciousness and reflection, Pushes like a force against the walls of the mind, Like the beauty of a cloudless morn, Something indescribable. On another plane, When you were young, paddling A warcraft canoe with your dad – captain, On Frog Lake…
Bus station ecology
Outside a café by the central bus station. Wasps. A gentle breeze stalling their forward propulsion. They hover, drawn to the foamed milk and cocoa powder topping my cappuccino. Enlightening places: central transportation hubs. A congregation of humanity’s diversity: addicts; homeless; drunkards clasping and gulping bottles of warm beer; schoolkids travelling home from school; workers […]
Lyrics #4 – Treaty – by Leonard Cohen
Check song out here. Treaty I’ve seen you change the water into wine I’ve seen you change it back to water too I sit at your table every night I try but I just don’t get high with you I wish there was a treaty we could sign I do not care who takes this […]
The fortress nursery
I am a play-acting leader wandering aimlessly, Trudging up and down each ridge and valley, Marching headstrong on twisted paths unknowing; Eager to say ‘Here is the way, follow me.’ I set off young, ill-equipped, and eagerly, To a distant snow-capped peak I aimed to journey, Heavy burdensome pack filled to overflowing; Doubt, inexperience, […]
Shifting shores
For eleven years we stood side by side, drifting on the surface of a mirror lake. Eyes cast down, we mistook our reflections for reality. And as we drifted toward the approaching falls, the surface remained smooth, unbroken, for we drifted imperceptibly. In and out of silent coves, we failed to register the shifting shores. […]
Cleansing an obsessed mind
What is my problem? I can’t control this anymore. Let it out. Let it out. Let it out. A million times let it out. Do you want to be that person? No? Let it out. Let it out. You don’t need control. Let it out. Let it out. Let go of the control. You don’t […]
A rose sits atop a ladder of thorns
Just because it hurts doesn’t make it bad. And pleasure can be an insidious companion. Addiction may bring ecstatic release; enlightened dedication, anxious suffocation. The devil wears many guises, and a rose sits atop a ladder of thorns.
