It took some time, but they finally arrived, the thoughts leading me to hope again. Here in the cold on a damp bench, water flows and ducks preen, and people walk past hand in hand. I would gladly share this space, and yet I am gladly alone, I just am and they just are, and […]
Tag: love
I chased and caught a butterfly
I chased and caught a butterfly, Behind glass trapped her, just for me. Her wings lost their colour, (Her beauty began to fade), Until blackened they dropped off, (Her body withered away). I chased and caught a butterfly, Trapped her beauty just for me. But too late I finally realized, That beauty is only beauty, […]
Thought for food – 12
If we insist on outdueling the other, we will eventually find there is nobody left to whom we relate. A healthy relationship is not a duel of wit or will waged behind defensive walls; but a patient organic blooming of giving, understanding, and compassion. Through giving we may receive; through understanding we may question; through […]
Thought for food – 9 – a psychological axiom
There is no such thing as dishonesty. It doesn’t exist in any meaningful sense. In our deepest selves fluctuating values constantly tug on the strings of our wills. Behind any deceptive act is a value held to be true; a belief which, no matter how wrong might appear to another, completely informs the actions of […]
Here I choose to live
A new world opened before me. One overflowing with light and love. I am neither reluctant nor expectant to enter, for reluctance implies doubt, expectancy implies dependency; I neither fear what lies within, nor seek salvation. I know this world is meant for me. I will take my time to explore and learn. I will […]
To the one I know but have never met
On nights when stars pierce the dirty panes, And the moon casts shadows in my dark room, With gentle embrace I cradle invisible space, And my velvet heart beats to thoughts of you. The miles between us are meaningless, Crossed instantly on avenues of moonlight.
I walk towards the dancing light
If there is no light, then there is no dark. I have fallen into the dark; I have become despair, doubt, infinite dread. The dark says, ‘Turn your back on the light, there is no hope there; the closer you are permitted to come to the light, the further you will inevitably fall. Stay here, […]
Thought for food – 7
Trust is the silent energy fuelling any healthy relationship; you truly appreciate it once it is broken, for the silence is replaced with the screeching deafening noise of its fragmented and metastatic parts, circulating like screaming cancerous tumours through the withering and dying relationship, illustrating with crystal moral clarity the following truth: trust is the […]
I heard a noise and saw an image
The solitary seagull’s single squawk heard through the open bathroom window. I am too far inland for any sea bird to speak through tilted glass. A distorted remembrance of a time yet to come. I see myself there up ahead, as I imagine I was. A strong and confident man. Ten, maybe fifteen years from […]
Epitaph
There she lay. Clearly at peace. Unburdened of 93 years of life. A warrior; strong, resolute, stubborn, beautiful. Were those eyes to suddenly open, it wouldn’t have surprised me. Were she to beat death, it would simply draw from me a knowing smile. In life there are two options: to crawl into the past and […]
The greatest gift
The greatest gift you can give another is a piece of your deepest self. Not your time. Not your money; but something more precious still. Is it understanding, or compassion, or attention that you offer? Is there a word bringing these together? Love? That piece you offer freely, that is the gift. You offer without […]
Lyrics #8 – A Murder of One – Counting Crows
Check song out here. Blue morning, blue morning Wrapped in strands of fist and bone Curiosity, kitten Doesn’t have to mean you’re on your own You can look outside your window He doesn’t have to know We can talk a while, baby We can take it nice and slow All your life is such a […]
The war of the obsessed mind
With my fingernails broken I scratch, Every single hidden crevice and patch, Until I, tediously excavating the last, Finally from this space move past. And yet with doubt constantly plagued, Trapped wild beast mercilessly caged, In my head the war bloodily waged, Inane, insane, engulfed, enraged. Have you yourself lost in loops been? Thoughts’ ends […]
Catharsis
I’m not reaching out. I’m not playing the victim. I’m not drowning in self-pity (though my knees are definitely wet). I’m reaching inward. I am fighting. I may be drowning in tears of frustration, sadness, hope, joy. I am suffering, but I am not only suffering. I am healing. Slowly, methodically, not always patiently, always […]
Lyrics #7 – I will survive – Cake cover
Listen here. At first I was afraid I was petrified I kept thinking I could never live without you by my side. But then I spent so many nights Just thinking how you’d done me wrong I grew strong I learned how to get along. And so you’re back From outer space I just walked […]
An old soul
I am an old soul. I weep at the beauty of woodland paths, of slanted sunbeams breaking through autumn canopies, and falling, twirling, dancing leaves of red, orange, yellow and brown. I love this world. And my existence. The animals in the forest, I know they are there. And that suffices. The trees, the streams, […]
4 am
I apologize in advance; I don’t want to bore you with these things. I know sooner than later I will be speaking alone to the abyss; my voice a fading echo traveling through stale air, reaching no ears. Nobody will hear. The pain, the fear. I want to run. Faster than the wind outside these […]
A life without you
And I can’t picture my life without you. Remember what you said: you leave now and she wins. Keep in mind, you pleaded, the reasons that brought us here. Walk in my shoes, you reminded me, see it from my eyes. Oh I tried. I tried and I came to see, to feel. The pain. […]
The fasting soul
There are words to capture how I feel, I have lowered my caloric intake to zero To discover what they are. My mind and body are one, Starving for nourishment, Twisting into hungry knots. What matters in this state? This life is all I get, And I fill it with emptiness; Cardboard cutouts of complex […]
Conversations with myself – #2
Stop feeding off my pain. I cannot take it any longer. The burden, the weight, is far too great. I am no longer your scapegoat, your bearer of misfortune. My pain cannot heal you. I am not your savior. Though I love you, I need my strength for me. For me and for them. (When […]
